Happiness myths
Of course, with so much that can impact our happiness – as well as all the different definitions, interpretations and uses of the word – there will always be some misconceptions to contend with. Let’s have a look at some of the most common ones and explore the truth behind them.
Happiness is just a state of mind
With so many different factors that can influence your happiness, it’s certainly not all in your mind. Hormones, habits, relationships, genes, diet and gut health all play their part. And while mindfulness can really help, there’s more to it than that – true, sustained happiness is linked to every aspect of your life.
“I’ll be happy when…”
A common mistake many of us make is to imagine or assume that we’ll be happy when we get something we want or when something specific happens in our lives. Getting a new job. Buying a new car. Going on holiday.
While these things may bring about a short-term high, the positive effects are often short-lived. We become accustomed to new circumstances or possessions and start looking for the next ‘thing’ that’ll make us happy. This is known as ‘hedonic adaptation’ where the positive effects that certain events have on our happiness fade over time.3 Long-term happiness isn’t attached to material possessions or moments, and you’ll never truly enjoy those things unless you take a more holistic approach to happiness.
I know what makes me happy
You may have a good idea of what you do and don’t like, or what keeps you in good spirits, but this doesn’t necessarily mean you can predict or pinpoint what will make you happy.
This also ties into the previous point about expecting certain situations, achievements or possessions to bring about happiness. Happiness can come from unexpected places and it usually develops over time, so it’s better not to have any expectations and to just enjoy the journey.
In fact, having high expectations for happiness can lead to disappointment when things don’t go as planned, and this can have a negative impact on your happiness.
Money doesn’t buy happiness
This is a familiar phrase, designed to remind us that money isn’t the most important thing in life. So from that point of view, it’s true to say that family, health and relationships are more important than money or material possessions. And simply having money won’t boost your wellbeing on its own.
But in the UK, the reality is that most of the things that help us find happiness are easier to find or more attainable when we have some money -
- a safe place to live,
- healthy food to eat,
- good running shoes,
- socialising with friends.
these things can all help improve our happiness, and they all cost money. And, of course, long-term poverty can be a serious obstacle to happiness, while financial insecurity strongly impacts stress, anxiety and depression.
So, to say ‘money can’t buy happiness’ is a flippant oversimplification. That’s not to say ‘you’ll be happy if you’re rich’ – that really is a myth.
And spending beyond your means or buying lots of stuff won’t lead to long-term happiness either. The short-term high that comes from spending doesn’t last, and so we often seek more and more. The hit needs to get bigger, as we become accustomed to it, but there’s a danger this can get out of control; ultimately leading to unhappiness.
Happily ever after…
Happiness can come from any and all aspects of your life. The science is interesting, but in practical terms, it’s useful to know what healthy habits you can adopt or lifestyle changes you can make to maintain your long-term happiness.
And remember, there’s not one simple solution. You’ll need to find what works for you and give it time. But then, as the famous saying goes: “Happiness is a journey, not a destination.”
References
- The science of happiness - Psychology Today
- The secret to happiness? - Harvard Health Blog
- Hedonic Treadmill - Psychology Today